WOW, its been awhile since I blogged. I have been trying to get settled, which has been a easy going process since we really aren't settled but at my sisters with about 1/10 of our stuff, the rest in storage.
It been fun with my sister, I don't even want to kill her yet.........just kidding Dina.
We are starting to look at houses next week which I am excited about, even though its like one house maybe 2. And who knows if it will work, past experience tell me that something weird will happen and it won't work out..If that is so, I have decided I am going to sit tight and just let life take me where it takes me. Something will come up for us I am sure.
This move has had me in a funny place I have never really been before. I have made it no secret that I did not want to move, but I think I have never shared a few intimate details about it. I know that this move is what we were suppose to do, I have no doubt in my mind. Many hours of prayers and tears were put into this one and I had to dig deep down to stay strong and be faithful, something I don't usually need to do. I have always done what I have been asked to do without question, I have always counseled with the Lord before making all my decisions, this time I didn't want to, but IT was confirmed to me what Mitch and I were suppose to do, I could not deny it. With saying that.. it has seemed NOTHING is working out for us or falling into place, and if anything it just seems accomplishing the simple things we need to get done are harder then it really should be and I feel my heart breaking still everyday. I still miss Rocky soo much it hurts, not sure where such a strong connection for that place came from but I just can't seem to let it go, I go to church here and I feel like everything is soo impersonal and BIG, too many people to swim though the halls with...and soo much hair and make up everywhere, its funny (Rocky was a little bow hunky, a little less fashion going on). Anyway, I miss my little town, but I know there has got to be great things at the end of this, and if there isn't, I have Mitch, and my children and my family, my sisters and some pretty awesome friends that I am soooo blessed to have..You know who you are!! and I really can't ask for anything more then that, since this is the plan the Lord has for me and I have to accept that, there are worse things I could be burdened with in my life. I am patient and know that its OK and whatever will be will be, but some days I am not sure how much more patient I can be. So here I sit, talking to myself about something I had no intention to talk about but it just kinda fell out...Sorry I have been such a downer lately, I feel like I have lost a little bit of my "haha" Not that I can't laugh or crack a joke or two, just I think my mind is too occupied to think of creative funny things to say....mojo is lost, if found..please return to whatever my address is, just a sec I will ask Dina...... Umm I was just kidding I guess because she isn't here to tell me what it is, soo if found just send it general delivery....it should get here no problem, it's a small town. Thank you.
So....I hope to find a house soon so that I can get settled and move on and get my groove back..Being at my sisters just feels like a vacation and I am waiting to go home...which I don't really have one. I mean seriously, I already did a stint in my parents basement and Mitchs parents basement...how is it I am now in my sisters?? How is it we can't ever find a house??? drives me a bit crazy, but I always survive and its always a good experience. And maybe I just need to be kept humble..........hmmm, maybe we won't go there... ;)
So ends the pitty party blog...pretty soon, I will be back to my old self and will again have lots of witty things to say, even if you think I am a bit lame, that's o.k...Sticks and stones people.....sticks and stones.... That one is mostly for Dina since she says I am the only one who thinks I am funny..Maybe Mitch tells me that too, although I let him know that he thinks I really am too just he forgets all the time, he should write it down in his day planner...then he would not forget.
Peace out.....
6 comments:
I think you are funny.
I know some people think we are lame, but we're not!!
Remember your house is being prepared for you! IT WILL COME and one day your life will be all yours (a long with 5 kids and a hubby and all the strays) and you will sit back and think, yup, here it is - the day finally came!!
Until then: bring on the Debbie Downer cause we are all right there with you!!
Hey Jana. I was reading your post and it felt like I was reading my own thoughts EXACTLY. I know where you are coming from and TRUST me, I am there too. I am patiently waiting for things to happen properly and in the meanwhile I am stressed and "lost". All I can tell is you and your sister have a great relationship and are so lucky to be near eachother, even if it's in the same house. I wish I could be closer to my sisters all the time. I hope things fall into place for you guys. You are awesome and like I keep telling myself...your time will come. :)
Awh cheese whiz, I remember your mojo. It's pretty awesome. I found another letter the other day - I'll have to show you on the weekend. It's really even better than the first, if you can believe it :) You've made a big sacrifice - which means letting go of something that you want or makes you stay in your comfort zone, and agreed to accept what the Lord had in store for you - which - at least in the long run - is going to be better than anything you had planned for or could make happen on your own. Faith and courage now sista. That's where it's at. Maybe you need me to haul my kids down there and intrude for a visit - that would surely lift your heart. And just like when we were kids and got 'stuck' I'll always be here to watch as you rescue yourself - haha. And ps - I have to tell you a secret...... ;)
Nice picture ;) Wellllllll, things will work out! They have to, b/c they always do... Just know that I am jealous of you and Dina. You luckies get to hang out every day!
whatever will be, will be.......
It will be ok and all will work out and in the mean time we get to chill out and be lazy everyday!! Maybe being lazy isn't quite as cool as hanging out but whatever..."I like to party all the time, party all the time, party all the time!!!!" Anyway, you really are the only one who thinks you are funny....stephanie is just trying to be nice and a good BFF
Good luck with house hunting! Tell Dina Hi!
Post a Comment